Insane Fairytale: Princess and the Pea
by Yutaka-chan
Summary: Warning: DO NOT LAUGH TILL YOUR HEAD DROPS


Characters:

Prince: Yoji

Princess: Ken

Queen: Schu

King: Crawford

Crew:

Director: Well, that's me

Manager: Saber Tooth

Producer: A

Characters view of their characters:

Yoji: Prince Yoji at your service! This will definitely help me get more ladies!

Yutaka: Don't be a prev, besides, the princess is Kenken

Ken: ?

Yoji: Noooo!!!!! Anyone but Ken! I'm straight dammit! I love girls and I'm not marrying a guy!!!

Ken: Who'd wanna marry you anyway?!

Yutaka: Saber Tooth… I always make fun of her and Yoji o-san!

Saber Tooth: 'whacks Yutaka on head' Stop uttering trash!

Schu: What? I always play the bad part? What's wrong with you people?

Crawford: Lucky me, I'm not an old hag anymore.

Ken: Hey! Why am I the princess?!?! And I have to wear a wig?!?!

Crew, Crawford, Yoji, Schu: Whaoh, you're reaction's a bit too slow y'know…

Now, the story:

**The King and Queen were deciding on who should get married to their Prince as their son is reaching eighteen.**

Yoji: Ah, I'm so young….

**Sorry, printing error. He's supposed to be twenty-eight.**

Yoji: What the f..k?!?

**They had the profiles of all the girls in town and were discussing one night.**

Schu: My, this woman is too fat, this is too skinny, this has no taste in clothing, this is too old, this is too short, this has too many bad habits, this is too ugly, this has no hair, this has no sense of direction, this is dumb, this can't speak, this is deaf, this is a widow, this is a whore, this lives on streets, this collects dung, this ploughs fields, this is too noisy etc…

Crawford, Yoji: 'sweat many many many droplets'

**Unable to find the perfect fit, the Queen suggested to let Yoji marry the intelligent and pretty daughter of their advisor, in which Yoji hated the most as she always bother him. While talking, they hear a loud knock on the castle door. A guard went to open the door to find a drenched lady dressed in rags.**

Schu: Urgh, what a disgusting girl! Put her away!

Ken: Whadda ya mean disgusting?!? This is what they told me to wear! 'receives glare from crew' Ahem. I mean, I'm a princess from another land, and I would like to seek refuge here. I will do anything in return.

**The Prince was enticed with her beauty and forced his mother to let her stay.**

Yoji: THROW HIM OUT1 THROW HIM OUT!

Crew: 'throws a knife that stabbed through Yoji'

Ken: 'sweat drop'

**The Queen was reluctant as she suspected the girl was lying, but she could never be too sure. She ordered her servants to dress the girl and make her presentable. A while later, the girl came out in a pretty pink dress. **

Yoji: 'vomits'

Ken: Yoji! Stop that! You're ruining the act!!!! 'takes shoes and hits Yoji'

**The Queen decided to use a way to see whether this was a real Princess. She ordered her maids to pile twenty mattresses and below is a pea. Only a real princess can feel this.**

**At night, the girl was having troubles sleeping**.

Ken: ZZZZZZZZ…. 'wakes up when being poked' 'falls asleep again'

**The next day, the Queen asked how she was feeling.**

Ken: That was one of the best naps ever! Ow! 'gets poked by a fork' I mean. I couldn't sleep for the night. Unfortunately someone kept poking.. ow! I mean something made me uncomfortable and I could not sleep properly.

**It was then the Queen acknowledged her son to be able to marry the girl.**

Yoji: Noooo… Anything but marry Ken!!! I'll do anything but don't let me marry Ken!!!!

A: 'threatens to stab knife in Yoji's head'

Yoji: Okay! I'll marry him!

**And so, the Prince and the Princess lived happily ever after.**

Saber Tooth: Hmm… seems rather short, but there's always the next one. See you then!

Yoji: I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay I'm not gay


End file.
